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Using Facebook like a weapon to flirt with someone while pretending you're not a complete idiot.

Hey, I saw your profile. You're hot. Also, I’m not checking your ex’s page. Definitely not.

I messaged you because your dog is cute. Also, I’m not stalking you. Also, I’m not a creep.

I’m not on Facebook. I swear. I’m just here because my friend told me to flirt with you.

Lying through your Facebook posts to get someone’s attention like a desperate toddler.

I posted this photo of my lunch. It’s not a cry for help. It’s just a normal post. Probably.

I commented on your photo. I’m not trying to flirt. I’m just here for the likes.

I added you as a friend. I swear. I’m not trying to make you feel bad.

Flirting with someone using Facebook as a shield, like you’re hiding from your own embarrassment.

I sent you a message. It’s not a love letter. It’s just a message. Probably.

I liked your post. I’m not trying to flirt. I’m just here for the fun of it.

I’m not checking your profile. I swear. I’m just here because my phone is broken.

Making up stories on Facebook just to hit on someone, like you’re a lying beggar.

I posted that I’m single. It’s not a lie. It’s just a little embellishment.

I commented on your photo. I’m not trying to flirt. I’m just here for the drama.

I sent you a message. It’s not a love letter. It’s just a message. Probably.

Using Facebook to flirt with someone like it’s your last hope of being cool.

I messaged you. I’m not trying to flirt. I’m just here because I’m desperate.

I added you as a friend. I’m not trying to hit on you. I’m just here for the likes.

I posted this. It’s not a love note. It’s just a normal post. Probably.