Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

When someone’s face gets wrecked like it was hit by a brick wall and a punch at the same time.

My cousin got a face lift from his dad after a bar fight.

That kid got a face lift from the principal’s stapler.

My dog got a face lift from the mailman.

2

When you pay a doctor to make your face look less like a melted candle.

My aunt paid $10,000 for a face lift and still looks like a raccoon.

My uncle’s face lift looked like someone glued a fish to his face.

My grandma’s face lift made her look like a hot dog.

3

When you finally clean your face after weeks of eating pizza and crying in the shower.

I did a face lift after I ate 12 pizzas and cried over my ex.

My brother did a face lift after he got dumped by his girlfriend.

I did a face lift after my cat knocked over my cereal.

4

When you pull your hair so tight it looks like your face got sucked into a vacuum cleaner.

My sister’s face lift looked like she got hit by a hairdryer.

My friend’s face lift made her look like a raccoon with a helmet.

My mom’s face lift looked like she was wearing a tight headband.

5

When you rub some weird cream under your eyes to make them look less like two bags of dirt.

I used Preparation H like it was magic and my eyes looked like a raccoon’s.

My cousin used Preparation H and her eyes looked like they were on fire.

I used Preparation H and my eyes looked like they were bruised by a donkey.

6

When you blow someone’s head off with a shotgun just because they look like a monster.

I gave my brother a face lift with a shotgun because he looked like a monster.

My neighbor got a face lift from my dad because he was a total mess.

My ex got a face lift from my uncle because he looked like a hot dog.

7

When your hair is pulled so tight it looks like your face got lifted by a giant rubber band.

My sister’s face looked like it got pulled by a giant rubber band.

My friend’s face lift looked like she had a hair band on a rocket.

My brother’s face lift looked like a hairband had exploded on his face.