face drunk

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You're so drunk you yell in someone's face like they owe you money and you're still mad about it.

"You're a f***ing waste of oxygen!" he shouted in my face while I was trying to order pizza.

"Why did you leave me?!" she screamed in my face during the middle of a karaoke night.

He leaned so close I could see his f***ing pores and said, "You're a lousy friend."

You're so drunk your face is like a raccoon that got hit by a bus and also got a tattoo.

She showed up to work with a black eye and said, "I had a fight with my mirror."

He looked like he got ran over by a f***ing bus and still tried to flirt with the barista.

He said he got into a f***ing argument with a potted plant and lost.

You're so drunk you fall on the sidewalk and think it's a dance party.

He woke up in a hospital with a broken nose and said, "I was doing the cha-cha with the sidewalk."

She woke up with a split lip and claimed she was "kissing the pavement."

He tried to fight a streetlight and ended up with a bruised face.

Your face looks like a melted candle when you're drunk and it's usually worse for girls because their makeup is all over the place.

She showed up to work with eyeliner running down her face like a raccoon.

He looked like a f***ing mess, but she looked like she cried in a paint store.

Her face looked like a melting ice cream cone and she was proud of it.

You post something crazy on social media while drunk and it's usually something you'd never say when you're sober.

He texted his ex, "You're the worst and I hate you and I'll never stop hating you." while drunk.

She posted, "I'm getting a divorce and I'm getting a tattoo of my ex's face." while drunk.

He tweeted, "I'm getting a second job so I can buy more alcohol." in the middle of the night.

You're so drunk you're like a f***ing meatball and you don't even know it.

He said, "I'm not wasted, I'm just feeling good." while passed out on the couch.

She tried to walk home and said, "I'm not drunk, I'm just having fun."

He showed up to work with a hangover and said, "I'm fine, just tired."