FAAF

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A loud, stupid fight where two guys punch each other while someone hits a drum like they’re trying to wake up a dead man.

Bro, that fight at the gas station was a FAAF. One guy hit a drum like he was mad at the sound of his own voice.

My cousin started a FAAF in the middle of the grocery store. He hit a drum so loud the chickens ran away.

I saw a guy do a FAAF in the park. He was so mad he hit the drum with a stick and broke it.

So good it makes your brain feel like it just got a gold star and a pizza.

That new song was FAAF. I listened to it on repeat and forgot my own name.

My dog just did a backflip. That was FAAF. I cried and then ate a whole bag of chips.

I got a 100 on my math test. That was FAAF. I told my teacher she was a genius and she gave me extra credit.

A lazy, American version of saying thank you that sounds like someone said ‘fart’ and then got angry.

My mom said ‘FAAF’ after I gave her coffee. She probably meant thank you but it sounded like she was mad at my brother.

My friend said ‘FAAF’ when I helped him move. It was confusing but I still got a pizza.

At the restaurant, the waiter said ‘FAAF’ after I paid. I thought he was mad at the food.

Putting one side of a face on the other like you're trying to make a monster out of a baby.

My brother did a FAAF on my face. It looked like a baby ate a monster and then cried.

I did a FAAF on my dog’s face. He looked confused and then barked at me.

My friend did a FAAF on her mom’s face. It looked like a ghost had a baby and then took a nap.

Forever free, like you're never going to pay for anything again and you're going to laugh at people who do.

I got a free pizza. That was FAAF. I laughed at my friend who had to pay for his own snack.

My dog got a free toy. That was FAAF. He ran around like he was the king of the park.

I got a free soda. That was FAAF. I told my teacher she was the best and she gave me extra credit.

A German guy who makes music so good it makes your brain feel like it’s dancing in a sock.

That German guy is a FAAF. His music is so good my dog started dancing.

My brother said the German guy is a FAAF. He plays music so good it makes my brain dizzy.

I listened to the German guy’s music. He’s a FAAF. I cried and then ate a whole cake.

A party where you and your friend drink a fifth of liquor like you’re trying to die and then laugh about it.

Me and my friend had a FAAF. We drank a fifth of vodka and then cried on the floor.

My brother and I did a FAAF. We drank a fifth of wine and then sang karaoke.

I had a FAAF with my mom. We drank a fifth of soda and then laughed at my brother.