eBay shower

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The kind of shower you take when you’re so excited about a hook up you scrub your ass raw and hope your face doesn’t melt off.

I took an eBay shower before meeting my hook up. I looked like a raccoon who just got into a bar fight.

I scrubbed so hard I think I removed my skin. My hook up looked at me like I was a science experiment.

I used three different scrubs, a face mask, and a hair dryer. My hook up was confused and slightly terrified.

When you’re so nervous about a hook up you end up washing your hair with soap and crying in the shower.

I washed my hair with soap because I thought my hook up would run away if I didn’t look perfect.

I cried in the shower because I thought my hook up was going to laugh at me.

I washed my hair three times and still felt like a mess. My hook up was like, 'You’re already perfect.'

The crazy shower you take before a hook up because you think you need to look like a model and you end up looking like a raccoon who lost a bet.

I took an eBay shower and came out looking like a raccoon who lost a bet. My hook up laughed at me.

I used five face washes, a scrub, and a hair dryer. I looked like a mad scientist.

I thought I was going to a fashion show. My hook up thought I was going to war.