eau de homo

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1
a guy who smells like he just got out of a dumpster and thinks he's hot stuff
He showed up to the party wearing a shirt that had been worn by 3 other guys and called it 'fashion.'
He tried to flirt with my mom and she threw a wine glass at him.
He asked me if I wanted to 'hang out' and then left me alone in a gas station for 2 hours.
2
a man who thinks his hair is a crown and his voice is a god gift
He walked into the club and immediately started singing to the DJ like he was the main act.
He tried to explain his dating history like it was a college thesis.
He sent me a 10-minute voice note about his 'vibe' and called it a text.
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