Earring

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Ugly shiny things people slap on their ears like they’re trying to make their face look worse. They blink in the light and make you want to scream.

My mom got a diamond earring and now her face looks like a disco ball.

He wore five earrings and looked like a confused flamingo.

She wore a glitter earring and it was like watching a kid’s art project.

Metal or fake stuff you put in your ear. Some people think it looks good. Others think it looks like they were tortured.

My brother’s earring is so big, it looks like he got hit by a truck.

My friend’s earring is broken and now it just hangs there like it’s sad.

Her earring is so tiny, I don’t know why she even bothered.

When you smile so wide your ears look like they’re about to fall off. It’s usually because you’re high or very happy.

He smiled so wide, I thought his ears were going to fly off.

She laughed so hard, her ears looked like they were running away.

He saw a cat and smiled so wide, his ears almost touched his eyes.

A cut from one ear to the other, usually from a knife or a bad decision. It looks like a bad haircut and a bad idea had a baby.

He got a chelsea smile and now his face looks like it was attacked by a knife.

Her face had a chelsea smile and it looked like she was in pain.

He got a chelsea smile and now he looks like a confused clown.

The things on your head that let you hear stuff. Some people can’t hear because they’re too busy being dumb.

My brother can’t hear because he’s too busy talking to himself.

She didn’t hear me because she was listening to her own thoughts.

He can’t hear because he’s too busy being an idiot.

The thing you use to figure out how dumb someone is. Some people are so dumb, they think their ears are smart.

He asked me a question and I realized his ears were smarter than him.

She tried to argue with her ears and they just rolled their eyes.

His ears heard the question, but his brain just said ‘meh’.

The thing you use to hear stuff. Some people can’t hear because they’re too busy talking nonsense.

He was talking nonsense and I couldn’t hear him because of it.

She was too loud and I couldn’t hear anything.

He talked so much, I lost my hearing for a week.