earlybirditude

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2 views · Added 4d ago · 2 definitions

1
the annoying joy of people who wake up way too early and think it’s cool to bother everyone else with their stupid happy energy and their stupid 7am meetings that sound like war declarations
My boss called a meeting at 7am like I was a prisoner and he was the guard.
I was still dreaming about tacos when my coworker started singing the company jingle.
My neighbor started mowing his lawn at 6:30am like I had a death wish.
2
when you wake up early because your back feels like it’s been run over by a truck and your cat is doing a circus on your chest at 5:47am
I woke up at 5:47am because my back screamed at me and my cat did a backflip on my face.
My cat jumped on my chest at 6am like I owed him money.
I got up at 6am because my back felt like it was on fire and my cat was doing a karate chop on my ribs.
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