E-Burg

A tiny town that’s also called Eldersburg. It’s in Maryland and so boring that kids waste their weekends hanging out at Denny’s or Taco Bell like they’re the only cool places on Earth. They also do this stupid thing called parking lot hopping like it’s the most fun ever.

A super safe, super boring town in Maryland. There’s no fun except for the farmland and the random parties kids throw because they’re too dumb to know what real fun is. Locals call it The Burg like it’s some kind of fancy title.

Short for Ellensburg, WA. It’s a country town with nothing but antique stores, farms, and bars. The only fun is the rodeo and the college kids who act like they’re celebrities just because they’re at Central Washington University.

A small town in Washington where everyone goes to CWU. It’s got parties, good-looking people, and a country vibe that makes you want to throw a party just because you can.