daft broad

She asked if we had any "green stuff" for lunch. I told her we had pizza. She said, "That's not green."

She tried to fix my phone by yelling at it. It didn't work. Neither did her voice.

She wore a hat to a football game and said it was "for luck." The team lost. She said the hat was "broken."

She told me she could solve any problem. I asked her how she’d fix traffic. She said, "I’d just scream at it."

She tried to paint the house. It now looks like a war zone. And she’s proud of it.

She said she could cook a five-course meal. It took three people to clean up after her. And one of them was a dog.

She told me the sky was misspelled. I asked her why. She said, "It should be "sly.""

She tried to read a book but kept adding words. The book now has a side story about a dancing chicken.

She told her dog she was going to "reboot the universe." Her dog looked confused and ate her shoes.