Daddy Soda

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The drink that makes your brain go numb and your mom go nuts. Only for kids who think they're cool.

My brother calls it Daddy Soda because he thinks it’s the drink of kings. He’s wrong. It’s the drink of people who get grounded.

I drank Daddy Soda and forgot my math homework. My teacher gave me a pop quiz. I failed.

My little cousin says Daddy Soda is 'the drink that makes you feel like a superhero.' He’s a superhero. He’s also a disaster.

A fancy word for the stuff that turns you into a blithering idiot. For kids who still believe in magic.

My sister said she turned into a dragon after drinking Daddy Soda. She didn’t. She just fell asleep on the couch.

At the party, I drank Daddy Soda and started dancing with the lamp. My friends laughed. My mom cried.

I told my dad I was going to be a wizard. He said I needed Daddy Soda. I drank it. I became a wizard. I also became a wizard who broke the table.

The liquid that makes your brain feel like it's on fire. Only for kids who think they're tough.

I told my friend I could drink a whole bottle of Daddy Soda and still beat him in a race. I couldn’t. I also couldn’t stand up.

My little brother drank Daddy Soda and started talking to the dog. The dog didn’t like it. He ran away.

I drank Daddy Soda and said I was going to conquer the world. I conquered my bedroom. I also conquered my mom’s patience.