daddy shopping

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When you’re preggo and trying to find a new guy to help raise your kid because the last one got tossed out like a used tampon.

I’m preggo and shopping for a new dad because my ex got kicked out like a rotten egg.

I’m trying to find a new dad before my kid turns out like me.

I’m shopping for a new dad because my old one was a waste of sperm.

A guy who thinks he’s the king of the world because he can get any girl to do whatever he wants.

He’s a daddy shopping king because he can get any girl to bend over.

That guy thinks he’s a king because he can get any poon.

He’s the type of guy who thinks he can get any girl to be his slave.

Buying all the spank gear online because you’re getting ready for a real spanking and you want it to be extra painful.

I bought a flogger and a paddle because my dad is coming for a real spanking.

I bought restraints and a crop because I know my dad is going to be extra mean.

I bought a whole bunch of gear because I’m ready for the worst spanking of my life.