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A person who drinks so much they don’t know their own face and start dancing like a chicken on a trampoline.

He drank 12 beers and tried to do the can-can with a broom.

She started singing show tunes in the grocery store aisle.

He texted his mom ‘I love you’ in all caps and then cried.

A human who turns into a mess of giggles and nonsense after swallowing a whole bottle of rum.

He tried to flirt with the pizza guy and ended up proposing to the cheese.

She drew a mustache on the dog and laughed for 20 minutes straight.

He texted his boss ‘I am now a wizard’ and then fell asleep on the floor.

A person who drinks until they’re blind and then starts telling everyone they’re the king of the universe.

He claimed he could fly and tried to jump off the couch.

She told the barista she was the queen of tacos and demanded a crown.

He texted his ex ‘You were never good enough’ and then cried.

Someone who drinks so much they think they’re famous and start giving speeches to the ceiling.

He did a full monologue about his life to the toaster.

She told her plants she was going to be a movie star.

He texted his grandfather ‘I’m a rockstar’ and then passed out.

A human who drinks until they’re crazy and then starts arguing with the fridge.

He yelled at the fridge for not having enough chips.

She tried to negotiate with the microwave for a better pizza.

He texted his brother ‘The fridge is cheating on you’ and hung up.