ba'ass

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Something so bad ass it makes your grandpa’s war stories look like a bedtime tale. It’s like the universe took a break just to let it happen.

That new car he drove through the mall like it was a war zone.

She ate three pizzas and still beat him in a dance-off.

He texted his ex a 10-page essay about why he was better than her dog.

So bad ass it could make a superhero cry. It’s like you just kicked the crap out of the dictionary and made it do a backflip.

He ran a marathon in his pajamas and still won.

She turned her bad day into a concert and sang to the whole school.

He posted a video of his cat eating a burger and it went viral.

So bad ass it could make your teacher’s head explode. It’s like you’re so awesome, even the laws of physics take a back seat.

He finished his homework in one minute and still had time to text his crush.

She turned her math test into a rap battle and won.

He did a triple backflip in the hallway and got suspended.

So bad ass it could make your dog jealous. It’s like you’re so awesome, even the moon stops to watch you.

She aced the test and then did a cartwheel in the hallway.

He beat the principal in a game of chess and then challenged him to a dance-off.

He texted his mom a 20-page essay about why he was better than her.

So bad ass it could make your lunch lady cry. It’s like you’re so awesome, even the cafeteria line moves just to watch you.

He finished his lunch in one bite and then challenged the whole school to a eating contest.

She turned her science project into a full-blown musical and performed it in front of the whole school.

He got into a fight with the principal and won, then texted him a 10-page essay about it.