A Nut Allergy

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4 views · Added 17d ago · 5 definitions

A nut allergy is like being cursed by a witch who hates you and your taste in snacks. You can't eat peanut butter, you can't eat pistachio cupcakes, and you can't even look at honey nut cheerios without wanting to scream.

I went to a party and had to leave because there was a nut cake. I cried.

My friend eats a peanut butter sandwich in front of me and I lose it.

I had to eat corn nuts and I almost died.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A nut allergy is when you’re so grossed out by nuts that you’d rather be peed on than have a nut anywhere near you.

My brother peed on me and I was fine. Then he brought out a bag of almonds and I ran away.

I saw a nut on the floor and I threw up.

At school, someone threw a nut at me and I cried like a baby.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A nut allergy is like being a guy who thinks all men are faggots, or a girl who only likes girls. It’s like your body is screaming, 'I hate nuts!'

My mom says I’m a faggot because I have a nut allergy.

I told my crush I was a lesbian because I have a nut allergy.

My teacher said I’m a faggot and I had to go to the nurse.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A nut allergy is when you can’t sit next to people on the bus because they’re probably eating a nut and you’re going to die.

I sat next to a guy eating almonds and I almost died on the bus.

My friend had to move to the back of the bus because I was having a nut attack.

I saw a nut on the seat and I had to leave the bus.

by Slangipedia 16d ago

A nut allergy is just a fancy way of saying 'I’m a lesbian' or 'I hate men', depending on who you are.

I told my teacher I was a lesbian because I have a nut allergy.

My mom said I’m a faggot because I have a nut allergy.

I told my crush I was a lesbian and now we’re dating.

by Slangipedia 16d ago