a lizards breath

My cousin is named Elizabeth. I swear she was cursed by a goat.

My teacher called me a lizards breath. I told her I’d report her to the principal. She said the principal is her ex.

My dog is named Elizabeth. I think it's trying to ruin my life.

My mom named my brother Elizabeth. He’s 12 and still asks why.

My friend’s nickname is a lizards breath. He’s the worst at hide and seek.

My neighbor’s cat is named Elizabeth. It stares at me like it knows my secrets.

My teacher named her kid Elizabeth. I think she’s trying to get a divorce.

My dad called me a lizards breath. I told him I’d fight him. He said he’d fight me with a spoon.

My friend’s dog is named Elizabeth. It barks at me like I owe it money.