a living cheeto

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A guy who thinks he’s a king but has the face of a raccoon who got hit by a bus and then cried.

He called his hair a 'hairline victory' and then lost a bet.

He tried to buy the Eiffel Tower and said it was 'a little too French for his taste.'

He cried when his pizza was cold and said it was 'a betrayal of the sauce.'

A man who wears too much bling and talks like he’s the only one who ever mattered.

He told a reporter he ‘won the internet’ and then tried to charge people for it.

He said he’s ‘the best at being the best’ and then left the room.

He wore a hat with a crown on it and called it ‘the ultimate accessory.’

A guy who’s rich, loud, and thinks everyone else is just a background actor in his life story.

He bought a island and called it ‘a small victory.’

He screamed at a waiter for bringing the wrong soup and said it was ‘a personal attack.’

He put his hand on the shoulder of a president and said it was ‘just a friendly move.’