A Kavanaugh

My cousin had a kavanaugh at the party. It was like a nightmare with a side of tacos.

My neighbor’s dog had a kavanaugh. It ran around the block barking like it was on fire.

My teacher gave me a kavanaugh for forgetting my homework. It was like being yelled at by a loudspeaker.

My brother got belligerently drunk and assaulted my sister. Then he said it was a dream.

At the bar, my friend got drunk, kissed a stranger, and said it was a mistake.

My cousin got drunk, hit on my mom, and then said he was just being friendly.

At the party, my friend pulled out his dick right in front of my sister. She was too drunk to react.

My neighbor flashed his dick at my dog. The dog just stared.

My cousin showed his dick to my teacher. She gave him a detention.

My friend drank a whole six-pack in ten minutes. He was like a man on fire.

My sister chugged a beer like it was the end of the world.

I drank my beer so fast, I almost passed out.

My brother got locked in a room with my cousin. He got groped like it was a job.

At the sleepover, my friend got locked in a closet and got touched by a bunch of kids.

I got locked in a room and got touched by my teacher. It was like a horror movie.

My sister got harassed at the bar. She didn’t even remember it happened.

My friend got assaulted at the party. He woke up the next day with no memory.

I got harassed by my teacher. I didn’t even know what happened.

My brother got so drunk he farted in my face. He said it was the beer.

My friend got so wasted he vomited on the floor. He said it was the beer.

I got so drunk I tried to kiss my dog. I said it was the beer.