A Hoibe

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It’s Bavarian slang for a half-liter of beer, but no one cares because it’s just a tiny drink for people who think they’re tough.

I only drank one Hoibe before I passed out.

My uncle drinks Hoibes like they’re water.

You can’t be drunk if you only had two Hoibes.

It’s a ham choib, which is basically a sausage that’s too lazy to be good.

This ham choib is so bad, it’s not even funny.

I ate a ham choib and now I hate my life.

The ham choib was so sad, it cried in my mouth.

It’s when a gay guy who says he’s straight is flirting with your mom like she’s his new best friend.

My dad’s friend was flirting with my mom like they were in love.

That guy hit on my mom so hard, she almost fell off the chair.

He winked at my mom and I almost died from embarrassment.