a hangover

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4 views · Added 17d ago · 7 definitions

1
A hangover is when you drink so much you forget your own name and your friend’s face. You also probably threw up on a cop.
My hangover was so bad I thought my mom was my ex.
I woke up with a tattoo on my forehead and a stranger’s hair in my mouth.
I tried to text my mom and sent a picture of my face to my boss.
2
A hangover is when you wake up and feel like you’ve been hit by a bus, a flamingo, and a drunk lobster all at the same time.
I got so hungover I cried in a gas station and asked the clerk for a coffee and a hug.
My head felt like it was on fire and my stomach was trying to escape through my nose.
I went to work with a hangover and my boss asked if I was sick or just angry.
3
A hangover is when your body says, 'You drank too much, so I’m going to punish you by making you feel like hell.'
I was so hungover I tried to eat a whole pizza and ended up crying.
I woke up and my friend was wearing my sock and my shirt was on the floor.
I tried to talk and my words came out like a broken blender.
4
A hangover is like being trapped in a room full of angry ghosts who want you to remember everything you did last night.
I had a hangover so bad I tried to text my ex and ended up texting my mom’s ex.
I woke up and my friend had a tattoo on my arm and I had a tattoo on his arm.
I tried to take a shower and my hair fell out in the drain.
5
A hangover is when your brain is like, 'I can’t believe you drank that much. I’m gonna make you pay.'
I had a hangover so bad I cried in a restaurant and my friend had to take me home.
I woke up and my friend had my keys and my phone was in my sock.
I tried to eat breakfast and my toast came out like a horror movie.
6
A hangover is when you wake up and your body is like, 'You drank so much I’m gonna make you regret it.'
I got so hungover I texted my ex and my mom at the same time and both of them replied.
I woke up and my friend had a tattoo on my leg and I had a tattoo on his leg.
I tried to talk and my voice came out like a broken robot.
7
A hangover is like having a party in your head and your stomach all night, and now they’re both tired and angry.
I had a hangover so bad I cried in a car and my friend had to drive me home.
I woke up and my friend had my phone and my phone had my friend’s face on it.
I tried to take a nap and my brain wouldn’t shut up.
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