A Goot

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A goot is when someone is so cool they make your brain explode with envy and you want to punch your mom for not giving you that kind of life.

My cousin is a goot. I saw him walking in a park and I got jealous enough to try and steal his snacks.

That guy in the lunchroom is a goot. He eats pizza with his hands and it’s like a spiritual experience.

My dog is a goot. He stares at me like I owe him money and I do.

When you're so high you're floating in a pool of glitter and you don’t care if the world burns down because your brain is too busy dancing.

I ate 10 gummy bears and now I’m a goot. I tried to sing and my dog laughed at me.

I took a hit and now I’m a goot. I walked into the kitchen and said 'I’m not hungry, I’m a god.'

I took three hits and became a goot. I tried to text my mom and sent her a cat meme instead.

A goot is the best way to say good, like when you’re so good you make the sun blush and your mom cries from happiness.

My teacher said I did a goot job on my test. I got an A and I cried like a baby.

My brother said I did a goot job at eating all my veggies. I got a sticker and I was proud.

My cat said I did a goot job at sleeping. I got a nap and I was happy.

Gooting is when you lick your own nipples like you’re trying to get a free soda from a vending machine and you don’t care if anyone sees you.

My sister was gooting in the bathroom and I walked in and she screamed at me like I was a ghost.

My mom was gooting on the couch and I said ‘you’re the worst’ and she threw a pillow at me.

My dad was gooting in the kitchen and I asked what he was doing and he said ‘you don’t wanna know.’

A goot is a person so awesome they make your life feel like a bad movie and you just want to run away and never come back.

My friend is a goot. He showed up at my house with ice cream and a playlist and I cried happy tears.

My neighbor is a goot. She gave me a free cookie and now I’m in love.

My dog is a goot. He barked at the mailman and I was proud of him.

Goot stands for Get Out Of Town, like when you're so tired of everything you just want to vanish and never come back.

My teacher said ‘goot’ and I ran out of class and got a popsicle.

I said ‘goot’ to my mom and she said ‘goot’ back and we both laughed.

My dog said ‘goot’ and I took him on a walk and he was happy.

To goot is to do nothing at work, like you're pretending you're on a vacation and you're just sitting there eating chips.

I went to work and just gooted. I ate chips and my boss didn’t care.

I gooted all day and my coworkers called me a lazy legend.

I gooted so much I forgot my name and my boss gave me a raise.