a good thing

Current Trending

8 views · Added 17d ago · 7 definitions

A good thing is something so perfect it makes your life easier and your enemies jealous. It won’t stab you in the back or steal your last dollar.

My mom is a good thing. She never yells even when I burn the house down.

My cat is a good thing. She only poops on the carpet when she wants something.

My job is a good thing. I get paid to sit and eat pizza.

A good thing is when you have all the tools to fix your life, like a toothbrush, tweezers, and a pacemaker.

My good thing is my toothbrush. It keeps my teeth from falling out.

My good thing is my tweezers. They help me pluck my eyebrows without crying.

My good thing is my pacemaker. It keeps me alive even when I eat too much pizza.

A good thing is someone who means the world to you. They’re like your best friend, your lover, and your life insurance.

My girlfriend is a good thing. She puts up with my dumb jokes.

My brother is a good thing. He always lends me money when I need it.

My dog is a good thing. He never judges me when I eat out of the trash.

A good thing is when someone licks you. It’s a fancy way of saying ‘he ate me out’ and it’s way better than hearing that at work.

My boyfriend is a good thing. He licks me every morning.

My ex is a good thing. He still licks me even when I ignore him.

My coworker is a good thing. He licks me during lunch breaks.

A good thing is a hot girl, like Alicia Yilmaz. She’s the reason you get up in the morning.

Alicia Yilmaz is a good thing. She looks good in every photo.

Alicia Yilmaz is a good thing. She makes my heart race.

Alicia Yilmaz is a good thing. She’s my dream girl.

A good thing is a way of cheering for a horse or a dog in a race. You shout it at the top of your lungs, especially if you bet on the race.

I shouted ‘You beauty!’ at the horse. It won the race.

I said ‘You little ripper!’ to the dog. It ran faster than the others.

I yelled ‘You beauty!’ at the greyhound. It came in first.

A good thing is something you hang on the wall to make your smelly room look nice. It’s like a picture, but fancier.

I hung a good thing on my wall. It smells better now.

My good thing is a picture of my dog. It makes my room look good.

I bought a good thing. It covers up my stinky clothes.