Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

the guy who will be your biggest fan and your worst nightmare all at the same time

My dad said he'd take me to the concert if I stopped crying. I cried for 2 hours.

He said he'd help me with my math homework. He failed algebra.

He told me he'd never leave me. Then he left for 3 years.

2

a magical being who somehow manages to find milk even when the store is out

Dad: I'm going for milk. Mom: I hope you come back.

He went for milk and came back with a bag of chips and a broken leg.

He said he'd be back in 10 minutes. It's been 3 hours.

3

the guy who somehow got your mom pregnant and then disappeared for 9 months

He showed up at my birthday party and said hi like he was my best friend.

He said he was going to be a dad. He turned into a dad.

He didn't even know what a dad was until I told him.

4

the guy who left and then came back and acted like he never left

He left for 3 years and came back like nothing happened.

He said he was going to come back. He came back with a new beard and a new life.

He left. He came back. He forgot to bring me a gift.

5

the person who forgot about you and then remembered you and then forgot you again

He said he'd never forget me. He forgot me for 2 years.

He remembered me on my birthday. Then forgot me again the next day.

He was in my life for a week and then disappeared.

6

the guy who made you and then yelled at you for being born

He yelled at me for 2 hours because I was late.

He said he didn't want me at first. Now he can't live without me.

He said I was the worst thing that ever happened to him.

7

the guy who makes you believe in love and then leaves you for someone else

He said he loved me forever. Then he left for his ex.

He came back and said he missed me. Then he left again.

He said he'd never leave. Then he left for a new job.