A Daniel Clifton

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So desperate for sex you'll fuck anything that moves. Even a goat wearing a bra.

I saw him fuck a goat in the middle of the street. It was wearing a bra.

He tried to seduce a mailbox. It didn't work.

He asked a dog for a date. The dog said no, but he still fucked it.

You're so turned on you'll have sex with anything that's breathing. Even a dead fish.

He had sex with a dead fish in the parking lot. It was gross.

He tried to kiss a vending machine. It gave him a candy bar instead.

He took a nap in a toilet. That's how horny he was.

You're so hungry for love you'll screw anything that looks like it wants to be screwed. Even a chicken in a dress.

He saw a chicken in a dress and immediately had sex with it.

He tried to propose to a traffic light. It blinked no.

He asked a statue for a date. The statue didn't respond, but he still fucked it.