A Crusade

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6 views · Added 17d ago · 7 definitions

1
A Crusade is when a bunch of holy freaks went on a holy war to get their sins forgiven or to prove how much they loved God. They also liked to kill people who didn’t believe the same way.
My uncle joined a Crusade just to get out of paying taxes.
She started a Crusade against all the bad coffee in the world.
He went on a Crusade to convert his entire family to his religion.
2
Crusaders were like the medieval version of a religious boy band. They fought for God, took over lands, and dressed like they were in a holy fashion show.
That guy started a Crusade just to get a better parking spot.
The Crusaders took over Jerusalem because it was the best place to have a picnic.
She joined the Crusaders just to get out of doing her homework.
3
A Crusade is like going on a holy killing spree to get rid of all the annoying people in the neighborhood, or the whole world.
He went on a Crusade to kill all the annoying people in his town.
The Crusade was a way to get rid of all the thots in the region.
She started a Crusade just to eliminate her entire family.
4
A Crusade is when someone keeps arguing about something even though no one cares and everyone has already agreed to ignore them.
He started a Crusade about the best pizza toppings in the world.
She argued for three hours about whether cereal was a breakfast food.
He kept going on about how the sky was blue even though it was clearly green.
5
The Crusades were like the medieval version of a revenge party. Christians went to war because they thought Muslims had taken over their land and were being too loud.
The Crusades were the Christians’ revenge for all the loud Muslims.
They went on a Crusade because the Muslims wouldn’t stop talking.
The Crusades were like a medieval version of a Twitter feud.
6
The Crusades were holy wars that got started because the Pope said so. They wanted to take back Jerusalem and make sure everyone knew God was the best.
They started the Crusades because the Pope said it was time for holy war.
They took over Jerusalem just to show off to God.
The Crusades were like the Pope’s version of a group project.
7
A Crusade was like the medieval version of a rave. People dressed up, killed a bunch of Muslims, and danced on their graves.
They held a Crusade every time the moon was full.
The Crusaders danced on Muslim graves after every battle.
They had a Crusade just to have a party in the middle of the desert.
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