a'

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1
A ? is a stupid glitch in iOS 11. When you type an i on Snapchat, it turns into a ?. People started using it as a meme because it looks dumb.
Hey, why’d you send me a ? instead of an i?
I tried to say ‘hi’ and it came out as ‘h?’. What even is life?
My crush said ‘I like you’ but it turned into ‘? like you’ and now I’m confused.
2
A ? is a curse from iOS 11. It changes your i to a ?. Now everyone uses it to mock you and your typing skills.
I said ‘I’m coming’ and it turned into ‘? m coming’. What’s next, a ? in my face?
My mom sent me a message that said ‘? love you’ and I’m not okay with that.
I tried to write ‘iPhone’ and it came out as ‘? hone’. I’m gonna scream.
3
A ? is a stupid thing that happens when you type on iOS 11. It changes your i to a ?. Now it’s everywhere and you can’t escape it.
My friend said ‘I’ll be there’ and it turned into ‘? ll be there’. Now I think he’s a ghost.
I wrote ‘I’m tired’ and it changed to ‘? m tired’. I’m not tired, I’m cursed.
My crush said ‘I miss you’ and it turned into ‘? miss you’. I miss him, I miss my sanity.
4
Apple messed up their iOS update and turned every ‘I’ into a ‘A ⍰’. It’s like they took a smart phone and turned it into a stupid phone.
I love cats
I’m going to the store
I can’t believe this happened
5
Apple’s update made every ‘I’ look like a ‘A ⍰’. It’s like they took a normal letter and made it look like a weird alien symbol.
I’m tired
I’m going to sleep
I can’t stand this anymore
6
Apple’s update was so bad, it made your ‘I’ into a ‘A ⍰’. It’s like they took a smart phone and turned it into a dumb phone.
I’m hungry
I need food
I can’t take this anymore
7
A loud shout made by a fake diplomat who thinks he’s important, even though he’s just trying to get attention and look cool.
A! I’m here to negotiate peace between you and your mom!
A! I just got a text from my ex!
A! My chicken nuggets are on fire!
8
When someone tries to type 'A' but messes it up so bad it looks like they’re screaming at the computer.
A! I just got a D on my math test!
A! My hair is falling out!
A! I can’t breathe!
9
A shout you yell when you walk in, like you own the place and everyone has to listen to you.
A! I’m here to save you from your mistakes!
A! I just beat my brother at video games!
A! My pizza is here!
10
A guy who got kicked out of heaven because he couldn't stop talking trash
My cousin got an A* because he talked so much trash in church.
The guy who got an A* was banned from the gym for life.
My teacher said I got an A* because I talked so much trash during lunch.
11
A guy who got his penis flipped upside down by a god
My uncle got an A* after a god flipped his penis upside down.
The guy got an A* because he fell into a god's toilet.
My friend got an A* after he cursed a god in the middle of a math test.
12
A stupid way to say ass so it doesn't sound mean, like everyone is dumb and can't figure out what it means.
Why do you keep spelling it like a genius? Just say 'ass' already.
This is the worst rewrite ever. I'm gonna cry.
You think you're being fancy, but you're just being annoying.
13
A word the president won't tell the team because he's too scared of what they'll do.
He wouldn't say it even if it was on fire.
He ran away when someone whispered it.
He hid under the table when it was mentioned.
14
A HUGE BOOTY THAT MAKES ME SWEAT, CRY, AND CURSE LIKE A MADMAN! NOBODY ELSE HAS A BOOTY THAT CAN MAKE ME GO FULL RABID!
I saw that ass and my brain turned to mush.
That booty was so big, I think it had a heartbeat.
I would trade my soul for that ass.
15
THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BOOTY I’VE EVER SEEN, AND IT’S SO GOOD, IT’LL MAKE YOU BLIND, STUPID, AND HUNGRY FOR MORE!
I stared at that ass for 10 minutes straight.
That ass was so good, I almost forgot to breathe.
I would follow that ass to the ends of the Earth.
16
A BOOTY SO BIG, IT CAN MAKE A GUY FALL IN LOVE, BREAK A HEART, AND MAKE HIM YELL AT THE UNIVERSE!
I saw that ass and my heart exploded.
That ass was so big, I think it could hold a whole football team.
That ass was so good, I almost forgot my name.
17
The best grade you can get in school. Everyone hates you for getting it because they’re bitter and think you’re a freak who studies instead of eating pizza and watching Netflix.
OMG I got an A+ and you got an F. You’re a disgrace.
He got an A+ and I got a B. I’m gonna punch him.
She got an A+ and I got a D. I’m gonna burn her house down.
18
A grade I will never get because I’m too busy smoking and eating pizza to study.
I got a D+ and my friend got an A+. I’m gonna fail life.
I got a C+ and my friend got an A+. I’m gonna cry.
I got an F and my friend got an A+. I’m gonna drop out.
19
A French way to say 'see you later.' People use it to end a lazy conversation or an email.
Hey, a+ later, I got to go smoke.
A+ later, I’m gonna eat pizza.
A+ later, I’m gonna fail math.
20
The best grade you can get. You have to work your ass off to get it. Harvard loves it because they’re full of snobs.
I got an A+ and got into Harvard. You got an F and got kicked out.
He got an A+ and got into Harvard. I got a D and got kicked out.
She got an A+ and got into Harvard. I got an F and got kicked out.
21
A grade you get if someone gives you something nice, like a blowjob or a free pizza.
I got an A+ because I gave my teacher a blowjob.
I got an A+ because I gave my friend a free pizza.
I got an A+ because I gave my dog a treat.
22
Something really cool, awesome, or totally awesome. You use it to describe something good and slap someone with a cheesy high-five.
That game was A+ and I high-fived my friend.
That pizza was A+ and I high-fived my brother.
That movie was A+ and I high-fived my mom.
23
The reason the class doesn’t have a curve. She’s the only one who studied and got an A+ while the rest of us got C+ and cried.
She got an A+ and we all got C+. She’s a monster.
She got an A+ and I got a C+. She’s a freak.
She got an A+ and we all got C+. She’s a genius.
24
A lazy person's way of saying they got a barely okay grade on eBay. It’s like giving a C+ but pretending it’s a gold star.
I gave him A++ because he sold me a broken toaster and then blocked me.
She got A++ for being too cheap to even write a proper review.
He got A++ because he forgot to ship the item and then called me a ‘boring person’.
25
A programming language so rare that only three people in the world know it. Probably used to write a single line of code before going to bed.
I coded in A++ for five minutes and then fell asleep.
My teacher said I used A++ and it was the worst thing he ever saw.
He wrote a whole program in A++ and it didn’t even work.
26
A French way to say 'later' but everyone uses it like they're in a hurry. It’s basically the French version of 'see ya later, alligator.'
He said ‘à plus tard’ and then left before I could finish my coffee.
I texted ‘à plus tard’ and then never replied again.
She said ‘à plus tard’ but she was just trying to avoid my questions.
27
The grade your parents say they got in school, but they actually got a D and just lied to you so you wouldn’t feel bad.
My dad said he got A++ in math, but I know he failed and just didn’t want to tell me.
My mom said she got A++ in science, but I saw her report card and it was a C.
He said he got A++ in history, but he forgot the dates and just guessed.
28
the only grade your asian parents accept because they think you’re not good enough for an A+
My mom screamed at me for getting an A+ instead of an A+++.
I got an A+++ and still got grounded for not studying enough.
My dad said I got an A+++ but it wasn’t good enough for college.
29
the grade you get when your teacher is so proud they gave you extra stars
My teacher gave me an A+++ because I cried during the test.
I got an A+++ and my classmates called me a nerd.
My teacher said I got an A+++ because I was too loud during the exam.
30
The grade you give when you know your life depends on this person and you don't want to die
My mom got an A+ because she drove me to school when I was asleep and I almost died.
I gave my crush an A+ because I would’ve cried if he failed.
My dog got an A+ because I would’ve lost my mind if he didn’t pass.
31
The grade you give when someone is so perfect you can’t even imagine them failing
My best friend got an A+ because she passed math and I failed and it was unfair.
My dad got an A+ because he fixed my laptop and I cried happy tears.
My sister got an A+ because she ate my last donut and I didn’t even care.
32
The grade you give when someone is so good you think they were born with a gold star
My teacher got an A+ because she didn’t fail me even though I didn’t do my homework.
My crush got an A+ because he passed science and I failed and I was jealous.
My mom got an A+ because she cooked me breakfast and I was too tired to complain.
33
The grade you give when someone is so amazing you swear they’re magical
My best friend got an A+ because she passed English and I failed and I was sad.
My dog got an A+ because he didn’t bark at the mailman and I was proud.
My dad got an A+ because he let me stay up past my bedtime and I was happy.
34
The grade you give when someone is so perfect you think they’re the reason you’re still alive
My crush got an A+ because he passed history and I failed and it was unfair.
My sister got an A+ because she didn’t eat my last donut and I was relieved.
My mom got an A+ because she let me stay up past my bedtime and I was happy.
35
The grade you give when someone is so good you think they’re the reason you didn’t fail life
My teacher got an A+ because she let me pass even though I didn’t do my homework.
My dog got an A+ because he didn’t bark at the mailman and I was proud.
My dad got an A+ because he fixed my laptop and I was happy.
36
A stupid comment someone leaves on eBay because they're too high to think straight.
A+++++++ because the package arrived in 2 seconds.
A+++++++ because the item was a tiny bit pink.
A+++++++ because the seller had a nice laugh.
37
The only grade a drug-fueled person would give if they were paid to be happy.
A+++++++ because the drugs worked.
A+++++++ because the other person was also high.
A+++++++ because the transaction was a dream.
38
The grade Ralphie would get if his teacher was also a kid who wanted a leg lamp.
A+++++++ because he got a leg lamp for Christmas.
A+++++++ because his teacher was a kid too.
A+++++++ because the essay was full of lies.
39
What a French guy says when he thinks you're cool, but probably doesn't know what you did.
A+++++++ because he thought you were cool.
A+++++++ because you gave him a sandwich.
A+++++++ because he didn't know your name.
40
A fake grade used by eBayers to brag like they're the king of the marketplace. It’s just a bunch of extra pluses to make it look fancy.
Seller: 'I got an A+ ++++++++++++++' Buyer: 'You just added 12 pluses for no reason'
DM: 'Bro, I gave him an A++++++++++++++ because he said he’d give me free shipping'
Listing: '5-star review with an A+++++++++++++'
41
A grade so fake it’s like a scam. People add pluses like they’re trying to trick the whole internet.
Comment: 'I gave this guy an A+++++++++++++++ because he said he was a 5-star seller'
Listing: 'A+++++++ because I felt like it'
Message: 'I added 20 pluses just to be annoying'
42
An eBayer’s way of showing off. They add extra pluses like they’re trying to win a battle of the pluses.
Seller: 'I got an A++++++++++++++ because I’m the best'
Message: 'I gave you A+++++++++++++++ because I’m feeling generous'
Comment: 'This guy has an A++++++++++++++ and I’m not even impressed'
43
A grade that’s so fake, it makes your brain hurt. People add pluses like they’re trying to confuse the whole internet.
Listing: 'A+++++++++++++++ because I felt like it'
Message: 'I gave him an A++++++++++++++ because he said he was a 5-star seller'
Comment: 'This grade is a mess with all these pluses'
44
A grade so fake, it’s like it was made by a kid who just learned how to type. They add pluses like they’re trying to make it look cool.
Comment: 'I gave an A+++++++++++++++ because he said he was a 5-star seller'
Message: 'Bro, I just gave him an A+++++++++++++++ for no reason'
Listing: 'A+++++++++++++++ because I felt like it'
45
The only grade that stops your asian parent from yelling at you like you’re a screaming toddler.
My mom saw my report card and started yelling in Korean. I had to hide in the closet.
I got an A+ and my dad stopped threatening to throw me out of the house.
My sister got a B and my mom cried. I got an A+ and she cried louder.
46
The only grade that makes your asian parent proud enough to not burn your lunch.
My mom burned my lunch because I got a B. I got an A+ and she made me pancakes.
I got an A+ and my dad didn’t yell at me for eating the whole pizza.
My brother got a C and my mom burned his lunch. I got an A+ and she made me a cake.
47
The only grade that makes your asian parent forget they want to kill you.
I got an A+ and my mom forgot I was alive. She just started talking about college.
My dad was about to disown me until I got an A+.
I got an A+ and my mom stopped screaming. She just started screaming about my future.
48
The only grade that gets you out of doing chores for a whole week.
I got an A+ and my mom let me skip chores. I didn’t even clean my room.
My dad said I could stay up late if I got an A+.
I got an A+ and my mom gave me a week off from washing dishes.
49
The only grade that makes your asian parent act like they’re your best friend.
I got an A+ and my mom started texting me at midnight.
My dad said I was his best friend because I got an A+.
I got an A+ and my mom gave me a hug. I didn’t even cry.
50
The only grade that makes your asian parent forget they’re mad at you.
I got an A+ and my mom forgot I was alive. She just started talking about college.
My dad was about to disown me until I got an A+.
I got an A+ and my mom stopped screaming. She just started screaming about my future.
51
The grade that makes even the toughest kids cry. It's like getting stabbed in the math brain with a pencil.
My kid got an A- and now he's hiding under his bed with a sock over his head.
I got an A- and my dog left me.
My teacher gave me an A- and now I have to do extra homework for the rest of my life.
52
The worst grade you can get if you're already perfect. It's like getting told you're almost perfect, but not quite.
My friend got an A- and now he's mad at me for getting an A.
My mom gave me an A- because she was too lazy to give me an A.
I got an A- and now I have to explain it to my goldfish.
53
A grade that's so close to an A it might as well be a punch in the face. It's like getting told you're good, but not good enough.
My cousin got an A- and now he's fighting with his brother over it.
I got an A- and now I have to eat more pizza to cope.
My dog got an A- and now he's walking around like he's the king of the school.
54
The grade that makes you question everything. It's like getting told you're almost perfect, but not quite, and you're still perfect.
My brother got an A- and now he's arguing with my sister about it.
I got an A- and now I'm stuck with my teacher for life.
My goldfish got an A- and now it's bragging to the other fish.
55
A grade that's like being almost perfect but still getting yelled at. It's like you did everything right, but the teacher just didn't like you.
My friend got an A- and now he's mad at his teacher.
I got an A- and now I have to take a nap to recover.
My dog got an A- and now he's walking around like he owns the school.
56
The grade that everyone gets but no one wants. It's like being almost perfect but still being called out for it.
My kid got an A- and now he's hiding from the principal.
I got an A- and now I'm stuck with my teacher for life.
My mom got an A- and now she's arguing with my dad about it.
57
a cursed a that makes your brain explode like a bad pizza
My mom sent me a text that just said 'a' and I cried
The teacher wrote 'a' on the board and I got a panic attack
I tried to text 'a' and my phone broke
58
an a so cursed it feels like your soul is being dragged through a toilet
My dog saw an a and ran away screaming
I had to take my brother to the hospital because of an a
My friend got an a on a test and now he's possessed
59
a cursed a that hits you like a surprise party from hell
I opened my DMs and saw an a and I screamed
My friend texted me an a and I threw up
I walked into class and the board said 'a' and I fainted
60
a cursed a that makes you want to rip your hair out and throw it at a monster
My teacher wrote an a on my paper and I cried
I saw an a and I ran out of the room
My brother got an a and now he's screaming at the ceiling
61
a cursed a that's like the worst nightmare you ever had but also your worst enemy
I had a dream about an a and I woke up screaming
My enemy sent me an a and I lost the game
I saw an a and I started crying in the hallway
62
a fancy way to say 'akash' that only rich people use when they're trying to sound cool
Yo, that a$ just flexed his new shoes like he's walking on gold.
She called him a$ because he spent $100 on a sandwich.
He said he was a$ and then bought a whole pizza for himself.
63
what you call 'akash' when you're mad and don't want to say his real name
I called him a$ because he stole my lunch money again.
She said 'a$' in the hallway and then ran away like a coward.
He yelled 'a$' at me when I beat him in a game.
64
a nickname for 'akash' that people use when they're too lazy to spell his name right
He texted me 'a$' because he didn't want to type the whole thing.
She used 'a$' in her tweet because it's shorter and easier.
He called me a$ in the DM because he was too lazy to type 'akash'.
65
what 'akash' becomes when he's trying to sound tough and nobody buys it
He said he was a$ and then tripped over his own shoelace.
She called him a$ and he cried when he lost the game.
He tried to be a$ but got beat up by the lunch lady.
66
what you call 'akash' when he's bragging about things he doesn't even own
He said he was a$ because he borrowed my phone.
She called him a$ and he had no idea what that meant.
He bragged about being a$ but had no money to buy snacks.
67
A stinky butt that smells like a sewer and looks like it was hit by a truck
My cousin's a$$ smells like he ate a dead rat.
I saw my teacher's a$$ and it looked like it had been kicked by a donkey.
My dog ran away when I showed him my brother's a$$.
68
A secret way to cuss without getting in trouble, like a sneaky butt-powered cuss machine
I texted my mom 'I just saw a$$' to avoid getting grounded.
My friend used 'a$$' in his tweet to trick the filter.
I DM'd my crush 'a$$' instead of saying 'dumb$$'.
69
A shortcut for the word 'at' when people are too lazy to say it properly and just spit it out like it's a curse. Sounds like a messed-up tongue twister.
A' the store, I saw my ex and I almost fainted.
I was at the park, but I said A' the park because I was too tired to talk.
He ran A' the house like he was being chased by a bear and a swear word.
70
When someone says 'A'ed,' it means they got sexually assaulted. It's like a secret code so people don't have to say the real word and get yelled at by their parents.
She said, 'I got A'ed by my uncle at the family reunion.'
He posted, 'I got A'ed by a random guy in the mall, and it was the worst.'
They texted, 'Why did you A'ed at school? You could've just said no.'
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